A Disturbance in the Force

No Limits | The Freedom Blog™

A Disturbance in the Force

Written by Steven Griggs | stevengriggs.com

“Well, the Force is what gives the Jedi his power. It’s an energy field created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us; it binds the galaxy together.”

Obi Wan Kenobi

I know you feel it. You know when there is something hijacking your energy, short circuiting your creativity.  When something is blocking you, almost like a force field that you can’t seem to break through.

I've been feeling it for the past week. Every time I’ve tried to sit down to write this article I felt blocked and sidetracked.

I would find myself drawn into a confusing whirlwind of feelings. A combination of melancholy, fear, frustration, anger, and it was not a good feeling.

And so I would stop, leave my computer and wait for the creative spark to show up like it always does.

But it wasn't coming.

I know why.

I've been going through many changes over these past four years. I have been shifting from being a very active investor, involved in every aspect of the real estate business- mortgage lending, foreclosure processing, developing and owning office buildings, mobile home parks and many other businesses, to being a full time writer and life coach.

I had reached the end. I no longer had the desire to do it anymore.

I've been a maniac business person since I was 18, building, buying, wheeling and dealing and I was very good at it.

But I just had to stop. And the chapter’s ending is near.

So what was happening?

There is really only one thing that can stop us and block us from staying in the flow of creativity.

And although that one thing comes in many forms and disguises, they all block you and they all cordon you off from creativity, from your force.

Fear.

Fear wears many faces- worry, uncertainty, doubt, insecurity…...

It comes in all kinds of variations, fear of change, fear of failure, fear of not being perfect, fear of the unknown but it always boils down to fear

In my case, feeling melancholy is the sadness of knowing a cycle is ending. And that brings up the question of what comes next, which brings up the fear of the unknown.

Frustration and anger arises when you have regrets or guilt. I felt both. I felt I should have been able to do both things, coach and write while managing all the chaos involved in these businesses and properties.

But that is not the truth.  I couldn't and I won’t.

What is true is that I haven’t turned the corner yet, almost, but not quite….

I am still playing the role of problem solver and strategist. But the problems that need solving and the strategies I could devise have no meaning for me anymore because I no longer see myself involved in that game. And old patterns can be difficult to change.

In a past article Your Exterior vs Your Interior, I spoke of how some situations may seem very hard and difficult at the time but it may be that this is a part of the process, a step that is required in order for us to move towards our new paradigm.

So that’s what I remembered: Change is a process.

Step back when you feel blocked. Take time to reconnect with nature. Stop and go have a cup of tea. Take a long bath. Just do something to change your state.

Years ago I worked with an assistant who when she saw that I was getting stressed out,  would tell me to go for walk and let the bugs blow off.

She was right. Sometimes you need to let the bugs blow off.

I know what my new path is and although sometimes I may feel tired and discouraged, I can see that the change is coming.

I am moving towards full alignment with my passion and my purpose. 

And I can't wait.

So the lesson again is that fear and all its relatives are created in our own minds. None of it really exists, we generate it, we nourish it and we make it real, all while it eats us alive.

See fear for what it is and understand that feeling fearful is ok, we are all just humans.

But after you acknowledge that you are feeling the fear, remind yourself that you have control over your feelings. So feel it, acknowledge it, remember it’s not real, and then let it go.

Remind yourself that you will soon look back on this time and smile.

It’s not real and never was.

Focus on the next step and keep moving.

www.stevengriggs.com

Luck- Good or Bad?

No Limits | The Freedom Blog™

Luck, Good or Bad?

Written by Steven Griggs | stevengriggs.com

“Luck is the idol of the idle”
Proverb

“It’s hard to detect good luck – it looks so much like something you’ve earned” 

Frank A. Clark

“Luck is what happens when preparation meets opportunity”

Seneca

Are you lucky? Do you believe in luck? And what is luck?

According to the Free Dictionary, luck is defined as:

“The chance happening of fortunate or adverse events….. one's personal fate or lot”

In almost every case luck is defined as something outside or beyond our control. As if we were just victims living out our lives on our predetermined path waiting for the next curve ball or surprise that fate has in store for us. See Wishing and Hoping

But is it true?

When was the last time something happened to you that you considered lucky? When some thing or some situation arose and made you stop and think: “Wow, that was lucky!”

Was it really luck? Was it really a coincidence?

Did you play any part in creating that luck? Do you believe in coincidence?

Are you really surprised when someone that you have been thinking about calling, maybe even just a minute or two ago, calls you? Or when you mention wanting to see a friend you haven’t seen for a while and then that day at the grocery store that friend walks up to you?

This would be called coincidence or luck. But it’s not.

I don’t believe in luck and I don’t believe in coincidence.

Once you get that you are creating your life at all times and that you have created the circumstances of your life, you stop blaming or complaining.

You will realize that you are attracting everything in your life, the good and the not so good. You can start changing those circumstances. 

Counting on good luck or waiting for your luck to change is being a victim. You are giving away your power. 

It takes time and practice but you can step out of powerless and into powerful. You can change your circumstances and therefore change your life.

The first step is to take responsibility for everything that happens to you.

Don’t be surprised when that friend or relative calls or you run into that friend at the store. Take responsibility and acknowledge that you reached out to them and they heard.

YOU created this, not luck.

The more you take responsibility, the stronger your power can grow.

(There are many techniques and lessons that can help you in this and I will present more ideas in future articles)

Once you get that, then you realize that you are the essence of luck.  You create your luck.

And then you realize how lucky you really are.

www.stevengriggs.com

No Whining!

No Limits | The Freedom Blog™

No Whining!

Written by Steven Griggs | stevengriggs.com

“I will not be as those who spend the day in complaining of a headache, and the night in drinking the wine that gives it” 

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“I can’t complain, but sometimes I still do”

Joe Walsh

“Do not listen to those who weep and complain, for their disease is contagious”

Og Mandino

“The people who live in a golden age usually go around complaining about how yellow everything looks”

Randall Jarrell

Do you ever find yourself whining?

I do.

Sometimes I find myself in a huge whining session, droning on about people, situations and problems.

I think we are all guilty of it at one time or another.

But what is really going on? Are we really complaining about the person or situation?

Is that the real issue?  I don’t believe so.

I believe that whining is merely a symptom. It’s a red flag letting you know that something is out of whack, something within you needs adjusting.

As a rule I try to always remain an observer of myself. I watch. When I see that I am reacting or having an emotional response that is way out of context with what is really happening, I ask myself, “Why is this pushing so many buttons?”,“What is really going on here?”

I try to step back and reevaluate what is happening. Then instead of reacting emotionally I reconsider and modify my response.

It’s not easy and sometimes I fail completely and fold into the emotion of it. But with time you get better and you can actually see yourself detaching bit by bit.

Basically you can’t really control your circumstances, only your reaction to them. I don’t mean you can’t change your circumstances, you can over time, but I mean reacting to the things that “happen” to you in your daily life. Change Your Mind 

This is the major cause of unhappiness and discontentment. You rail against any circumstance that contradicts your wishes or desires. For example, you want to go to the beach, but it starts raining or you want to take a road trip but your car breaks down.

The next time you find yourself whining, take a hard look at it. Look underneath what it is that you are complaining about and try to see the real issue. I’ll bet you’ll see that it always comes back to you.

You feel unappreciated or unloved. You are frustrated with your home life or job situation. You feel stuck. You are surrounded by dysfunctional people.

It goes on and on. But the common denominator is always you. These are all issues that you can change or modify. It’s never about anything else.

So if you know you are the source are you willing to change your responses? Or is it much easier to stay in place, accept the situation and wallow in your pool of self-pity and whine?

Watch yourself. When you start to whine, stop, take a deep breath and either modify what you were going say or don’t say anything at all.

Try to remember this mantra: “Never complain, never explain”.

www.stevengriggs.com

Take Massive Action

No Limits | The Freedom Blog™

Take Massive Action

Written by Steven Griggs | stevengriggs.com

“Do you want to know who you are? Don't ask. Act! Action will delineate and define you.”

Thomas Jefferson

“There are risks and costs to action. But they are far less than the long range risks of comfortable inaction.”

John F. Kennedy

“Action requires forward movement. If you stand still for too long you will eventually fall over.”

Steven Griggs

In past articles I’ve talked about taking action by using action plans Are You are Finisher or a Fumbler? and sub goals and using SMART methods to reach goals.

The type of action I am talking about today is a bit different. Today I am talking about taking massive action. This means a very aggressive, almost attack like approach to accomplish something.

It could be a full court press on a business opportunity or a start-up idea.  It means focusing 100% of your mind, energy and resources on a situation. It means having such total commitment and laser like focus that you are almost acting like a crazy person, that you are almost disconnected from reality.

I have just been there myself.

Recently I’ve been involved in negotiations regarding a property I sold several years ago that have required me to take immediate massive action.

According to our contract the buyers were to refinance the property shortly after we closed the sale. The refinance would pay off a loan that I had placed on the property and the balance of the sales price that I was still owed.

After trying for the last three years, for a variety of reasons they were unable to refinance the property. During this time the original lender, who had been working with the buyer, began to have financial problems and sold the mortgage to a vulture investor.

Vulture investors are opportunistic bargain hunters and seek out distressed situations. They usually start by buying the debt of the property or company at a steep discount and then use that position to force the property or business owner to pay them off at face value. They also sometimes take title to the business or property through a foreclosure or negotiated (forced) sale.

Either way the vulture investors make a fantastic return.

The vulture that bought this note filed a foreclosure. They contacted me and demanded that I pay off their mortgage.

I have been managing this property for the past three years while I was waiting to be paid off. Because of my efforts and being on site I was able to keep tenants in the property and keep the property going.

But things were changing. Old tenants were moving out and new tenants were not moving in. The property was starting to look shaky.

After dealing with the buyer for three years and having had several conversations with the bank I knew this situation was going nowhere fast.

I also realized that I needed to take massive action to send a message to the buyer and the bank.

I don’t know if it was because I had just had it with the buyer’s incompetence or having had to listen to the demands of some banker, but I felt a wave of clarity sweep over me that told me I was done!

I notified both parties that I was done and I was moving out of the property. They could have the property and deal with the tenants and problems themselves.

I really meant it. I actually packed up my office and moved out.

This served two purposes. One, the bank and buyer could verify that I was really gone, that I had actually moved out. Secondly, because I really was done emotionally, when I spoke with them they could feel it. They knew I wasn’t playing their game anymore. It was for real.

Now, moving out was a pain and I didn’t really want to but I knew I had to.

Consequently, the buyer has since approached me about transferring the property back to me and the bank is considering modifying the mortgage if I take over the property.

Of course this could all change and if it does, I’m OK. I’m OK because by going through this process I have detached myself from the outcome and I’m looking forward to my next step, whatever that may be.

So next time you are faced with a situation, one that seems insurmountable, think about taking massive action.

You don’t necessarily have to go crazy like I me or do something dangerous or hurtful, you just have to remember the power inherent in taking massive action.

So take action!

www.stevengriggs.com

Growing

No Limits | The Freedom Blog™

Growing

Written by Steven Griggs | stevengriggs.com

“If you’re in a bad situation, don’t worry it’ll change. If you’re in a good situation, don’t worry it’ll change.”

John A. Simone, Jr.

“When you are through changing, you are through.”

Bruce Barton

“To exist is to change, to change is to mature, to mature is to go on creating oneself endlessly.”

Henri Bergson

“What you have become is the price you paid to get what you used to want.”

Mignon McLaughlin

It is said that the only time you are growing is when you are uncomfortable.

This is true.

In my experience, the very things that I feared and eventually accomplished now seem like small milestones. Well, not all are small, some are actually fairly big.

But in each case I can look back and remember the fear that held me back and all the ways that I rationalized or made excuses to keep myself from ever having to do that scary thing. 

But each time as I conquered one fear, I gained a little more self-confidence and a little more urge to try other scary things. It can actually become a little addicting.

It’s an interesting feeling.

It’s a bit like sky diving or bungee jumping. You can’t over think it or try to wrap your mind around it. You just have to do it. You have to step off into the abyss.

For me it was like telling myself, "OK if I pull this rip cord, I’m going to die……" and then you pull the rip cord….. .

We all have our personal fears. Things like performing or speaking in front of groups, showing your artwork, playing and singing your own songs. You know, opening ourselves up to others, showing something of our selves.

It’s uncomfortable.

But there are all sorts of other, more subtle fears that we live with that aren’t as obvious or as in your face as stepping off a bridge or pulling a rip cord.

Most of us fear change. Many of us, in order to avoid change and any discomfort have retreated into safe, rigid routines. See The Comfort of Routine . We have tucked ourselves away into predictable, never changing habits and stay safely within the daily rhythm of our lives.

But underneath that rhythm, things are changing. You can't necessarily see the changes at first, but they are coming. 

These are the changes you need in order to grow. Most of them you are creating yourself, unconsciously.They have already been requested, like seeds that you have sown. 

If you get quiet and listen to your deeper mind, you can hear whispers of the things you want changed. 

Some of these may be things you already know you need to change, so you won't have to listen very hard. See Opening Doors .

Yes, change is uncomfortable. But no matter how you bring the changes, consciously or unconsciously, change will happen.

You can't really get ready for change. You have to accept it. You just have to know that everything is as it should be. You are always exactly where you should be. 

Someday you'll look back and see that this is how you became who you are. 

Let go, step into the changes. Geronimo! 

www.stevengriggs.com