Freedom Blog

Saturday, December 29, 2012

No Resolutions


No Limits | The Freedom Blog

No Resolutions

Written by Steven Griggs | stevengriggs.com

"It is always during a passing state of mind that we make lasting resolutions"
Marcel Proust

“Every man should be born again on the first day of January. Start with a fresh page……  let every man gird himself once more, with his face to the front, and take no interest in the things that were and are past.”
Henry Ward Beecher

This year resolve to make no resolutions.

Just don’t go there.

For most a resolution is a wish or a desire to change something- quitting smoking, exercising more, doing more of this or less of that.

But it’s a statistical fact that by the end of the 2nd week of the New Year 33% of the resolutions that were made have already fallen by the wayside. By the end of the year 88% have been given up.

All that really happens is that you reinforce to yourself that you are unable to keep your commitments. You temporarily assuage your guilt or frustration with your current situation by making a promise to take action. Underneath your promise you know you won’t complete your commitment but just agreeing to it is almost good enough.

In a way it’s like buying a self-help book, you never really read it but it feels good just having it on your book shelf.  You plan on reading it someday but in the meantime just knowing that the knowledge is there waiting somehow comforts you.

What about New Year’s resolutions?

I think the New Year allows us a chance to reboot, to create a starting point for change or milestone to measure new progress from.

That is all good. The problem is in the way we approach it.

You may know from previous posts that I don’t believe in committing to anything unless you are really ready. In fact, I believe you need to reinforce your word by committing to the current action, whether it be eating junk food, eating too much candy, whatever. Don’t undermine yourself by promising to do something just because it sounds good.  You are just fooling yourself and that's actually embarrassing if you think about it.....

Instead, commit to continue what it is you are doing but at the same time promise yourself that when the time is right and you are ready you will make the commitment to change or modify that particular action. 

By keeping your word you start to rebuild your integrity with yourself. When the time is right you will be a little stronger and more committed.

The first step in learning to understand one’s self and begin the process of self-actualization starts with understanding how you have been operating. How you manage your life.

To do that you need to become more aware. To become more aware of everything that is going on inside and outside of you.

So this New Year’s eve instead of making a promise you won’t keep, agree with yourself that from now on you will become more of an observer, a watcher.

This isn't a promise or a commitment but simply an agreement to shift into a slightly more observant place.

Just watch. Silently.

I guarantee you can do it and as you do so you will see more and understand more.  

It’s really part of our basic nature to be observant and watch. It is how we survived as a species for millions of years. This ability is hard wired into us.

So start the New Year with no resolutions. Just agree that from now on you will simply watch more. And maybe talk a little less….

You will be rewarded with more understanding of yourself and your world. This opens you up to changing and expanding who you are, to becoming more powerful and more free.

This January 1st could mark the beginning of the new you.


Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Discipline


No Limits | The Freedom Blog


Discipline

Written by Steven Griggs | stevengriggs.com


“Without discipline there’s no life at all.”
Katherine Hepburn

“Discipline is remembering what you want.”
David Campbell

“Many of life’s circumstance are created by three basic choices: the disciplines you choose to keep, the people you choose to be with; and the laws you choose to obey.”
Charles Millhuff

For 5 generations my family was involved the livestock and farming businesses. 

Growing up in a ranching family meant I started working at a young age. On a ranch there is always something to do, bucking hay, feeding livestock, sorting and moving livestock, building corrals, repairing fences, the work never ends.

Starting as young as I did, I thought it was normal. I loved waking up at the crack of dawn or even earlier if you were shipping livestock (loading livestock on trucks), working hard all day, eating some lunch and then heading home in the late afternoon.

By doing this since childhood I naturally developed the discipline of getting up early. This doesn’t mean getting up later is a bad thing but for me rising with the sun helps me to feel connected to the natural rhythm of the planet.

I love the quiet. Everyone is still sleeping or just getting up and the omnipresent background drone of town/city noise is just beginning to rise in volume…..

Discipline is probably the most important aspect of becoming self-actualized. It is the key to mastering all the practices we need to implement to be free in our lives.

Without discipline we cannot remain detached. We cannot maintain our integrity. We will not be able to accept what is.

Thus, we will not be able to maintain the structure we need to live a free life.

How do you find discipline? How do you become disciplined?

By committing.

Yes, it is a commitment but not in a negative way because in many ways you are already disciplined. For example, we all have underlying morals. We know right from wrong. You know what it means to do the right thing.

This is an example of discipline.  It may not seem like a discipline but it is. It is a deeper commitment to behave in a certain way, therefore a discipline.

I view discipline as a sort of actuator. It does not have to be something that you take on begrudgingly. It is not something you do against your will, it becomes your will.

I see it almost as a kind of filter. You allow a mindset of discipline to settle over you and become the filter through which you view and operate your life.

In fact once you start allowing a little discipline to “take over”, it grows and expands. It becomes a part of you. It infiltrates every corner of your life. It enhances you, it helps you become the best you.

The small steps you take to implement your practices become self-fulfilling. The joy of being true to yourself by being disciplined brings a feeling of accomplishment that feeds you and encourages you to continue.

When you make a promise and keep it, it is one small reaffirming step. That step leads to the next and to the next.....

It is not always a continuous path of success. It never is. It is a journey that requires restarts, regrouping and recommitting. Sometimes on a daily basis.

But it doesn't matter and that’s the point of this.  

You become disciplined to maintain your discipline.

There is no failure, only momentary lapses of discipline.

Get up and get back on track.

 


Sunday, December 9, 2012

Acceptance


No Limits | The Freedom Blog

Acceptance

Written by Steven Griggs | stevengriggs.com

“The first step toward change is awareness. The second step is acceptance.
Nathaniel Branden
“We cannot change anything until we accept it.
Carl Jung

In my last article on detachment I explained that being detached means not having any expectations because you aren't attached emotionally to what happens next.

Acceptance is the other side of detachment. Acceptance is the active or conscious part of being detached.

This is the part that initially requires your active vigilance because by being detached you aren't always dealing with a contradiction. Sometimes, actually most of the time, you will be getting what you want. (Really, you are always getting what you want...) So instead of having to be detached from a contradictory outcome you must also be detached from a positive outcome.

That sounds a bit odd and what does it actually mean?

Expecting and accepting a desired outcome can be tricky because if you get used to things  always going your way you could begin to expect it and then become attached to the outcome. In other words you become a bit spoiled and will find yourself thrown off track the next time you get contradicted.

The trick to it is to remain detached while allowing yourself to have a preference but not a requirement or a need.

You would prefer that it was a sunny day but rain is fine too. You wanted the parking space in front of Starbucks but the lot was full so you parked on the street. Each contradiction is a momentary blip with no emotional component to it, you just roll with it.

I’d be willing to bet that more often than not you generally do get a good parking space every time you pull into Starbucks…..

So what do you do when things are going your way? You know, when you are really in the zone and things are just flowing….?

You accept it and smile to reaffirm your alignment with the outcome.

In fact sometimes I break out laughing because the synchronicity is so overwhelming. So I laugh and give a silent thank you……..

We have to remember we are attracting our life to us at all times. Every single thing in our life is there because we have attracted it, consciously or unconsciously. So attracting unwanted or “negative” outcomes is not really a negative anything. It is an opportunity.

Be in alignment with your desired outcomes, remain detached from outcomes and understand that in time contradictions will disappear. 

In time as you become more and more in alignment, every outcome will be welcomed as an opportunity and will no longer be a contradiction.

Acceptance won't even be on your mind, because what is, is.

Accept outcomes instead of expecting them