No Limits |
The Freedom Blog™
No Whining!
Written
by Steven Griggs | stevengriggs.com
“I will not be as those who spend the day
in complaining of a headache, and the night in drinking the wine that gives
it”
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
“I can’t complain, but sometimes I still
do”
Joe Walsh
“Do not listen to those who weep and
complain, for their disease is contagious”
Og Mandino
“The people who live in a golden age
usually go around complaining about how yellow everything looks”
Randall Jarrell
Do you ever find
yourself whining?
I do.
Sometimes I find
myself in a huge whining session, droning on about people, situations and
problems.
I think we are all
guilty of it at one time or another.
But what is really
going on? Are we really complaining about the person or situation?
Is that the real
issue? I don’t believe so.
I believe that whining
is merely a symptom. It’s a red flag letting you know that something is out of
whack, something within you needs adjusting.
As a rule I try to
always remain an observer of myself. I watch. When I see that I am reacting or
having an emotional response that is way out of context with what is really happening,
I ask myself, “Why is this pushing so many buttons?”,“What is really going
on here?”
I try to step
back and reevaluate what is happening. Then instead of reacting emotionally I
reconsider and modify my response.
It’s not easy and
sometimes I fail completely and fold into the emotion of it. But with time you
get better and you can actually see yourself detaching bit by bit.
Basically you can’t
really control your circumstances, only your reaction to them. I don’t mean you
can’t change your circumstances, you can over time, but I mean reacting to the
things that “happen” to you in your daily life. Change Your Mind
This is the major cause
of unhappiness and discontentment. You rail against any circumstance that
contradicts your wishes or desires. For example, you want to go to the beach,
but it starts raining or you want to take
a road trip but your car breaks down.
The next time you find
yourself whining, take a hard look at it. Look underneath what it is that you
are complaining about and try to see the real issue. I’ll bet you’ll see that
it always comes back to you.
You feel unappreciated
or unloved. You are frustrated with your home life or job situation. You feel
stuck. You are surrounded by dysfunctional people.
It goes on and on. But
the common denominator is always you. These are all issues that you can change
or modify. It’s never about anything else.
So if you know you are the source
are you willing to change your responses? Or is it much easier to stay in place, accept the situation and wallow in your pool of self-pity and whine?
Watch yourself. When
you start to whine, stop, take a deep breath and either modify what you were
going say or don’t say anything at all.
Try to remember this mantra:
“Never complain, never explain”.
