No Limits | The Freedom Blog™
Fear
Written by Steven Griggs | stevengriggs.com
“I must not fear. Fear
is the mind-killer.
Fear is the
little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear. I
will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone
past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has
gone there will be nothing. Only I will
remain.”
Frank
Herbert-“Dune”
Are you fearful? Are
there times when you feel fear creeping into you, filling you up with doubt,
your mind racing with possible solutions and outcomes? Have you felt like a
trapped animal trying to find the way out, to escape, to be free again? Searching
to find the answer that can lift this dark veil? To find a way to end the
rising tension and crippling feeling of helplessness that flows into you….?
I know I have. And I’m
pretty sure most of us have felt it.
But is it real? And
what is fear?
Essentially, there are
two types of fear:
The first is the
ancient, hardwired “Fight or Flight” response. This is triggered by a direct
outside stimulus: someone is outside your door trying to break in; you are
confronted by a violent person; you are about to go on stage for a performance
or speech, etc.
This triggers a
chemical response in your brain and adrenaline and cortisol are released into
your bloodstream. You experience a rise in blood pressure, rapid heart rate,
sweating, a sharpening of your senses as your body gets ready to fight or run.
The other type of fear
is a reaction to some outside event or new information you have become aware
of, some future event that may happen.
This type of fear manifests as anxiety. You become anxious because your ego mind
does not know what is coming next and becomes more frantic because it doesn’t
know. It panics because it can’t see the answer or know what the response should be.
How do you handle
these fears?
Of the two, fight or
flight is basically hardwired into us and can’t really be changed and for a
good reason, it helps us survive.
In time the fear of
public speaking or performing in front of crowds may lessen and other fears
become less intense from familiarity and experience.
The second type of
fear is basically a fear of the unknown. Again, it’s your ego mind’s need to
know what’s coming and control outcomes. Fear does not exist outside your mind.
There are methods you
can use to mitigate or lessen the impact fear has on your mind.
One thing I always
come back to is to remind myself of the 80/20 rule or Paretos’s Principle: 80%
of the things you worry about don’t happen and the 20% that do, aren’t as bad
as you thought they’d be.
Here are three things
to do:
1. Ask,
is it real? Fear only exists within you. There is no
such thing as fear “out there”, only inside, so acknowledge to yourself that
feeling fearful is ok but it is only a response. You can change your response.
2. Believe
in yourself and acknowledge that you are in control. It’s
your mind, you are at the controls. Know that you have the ability to handle
anything that comes at you. You already know the correct response. It always
comes down to two answers: “They will or they won’t”, “It will work or it
won’t”. “Yes or no”.
There are no good or
bad outcomes, there is just the outcome. You just accept what is and respond to
next set of circumstances.
3. Accept
what is. Whatever the outcome is, accept it and make a
new plan. If you’ve done your best and taken action on your best idea, then let
go and get ready for the next step.
Don’t waste one minute living in fear.
Don’t give fear the time of day. It’s not real.
Live this life fully and know that when
you look back some day these issues will seem very insignificant.
And if the worst happens, what is it?
Really, what’s the worst that could
happen?
There are no more debtor’s prisons. Damaging your credit means nothing, that can be mitigated easily. Losing face
or feeling humiliated is over rated, because it doesn’t really matter what
other people think. Losing homes, net worth or assets is nothing. You can
replace them later. If you are sued, so what, settle or walk away and start
over.
If you have your health, your mind, and
an idea, you can rebuild anything you think you’ve lost.
Just look at these issues as turds in
the road. Go over or around them but keep moving.
